Identity Crisis

According to Google, creating a new email address is a piece of cake. My little brother (who is now not-so-little-and-is-taller-than-me-damn-him) would beg to differ though, since the two of us spent the entire evening thinking of a username for him. As he was reluctant to use his own name, we had to come up with something that had not been taken already in the long-enough-relative-to-Internet-time history of Google. And that, my dear friends appeared quite the Herculean task.

My brother insisted on suggesting the most trite of all possible usernames, inspired by his limited creativity and gaming and TV (anime mostly) influences, which, staying true to the spirit of collectivism spread throughout the world when it comes to originality, were already taken. A list of some of the names tried out that I happen to remember at the moment is given below. Please feel free to laugh your backsides off at appropriate (and inappropriate) moments.

catseye : Taken
(For some reason, my brother showed a sudden feline influence in his taste)
straycat : Taken
(The poor kid had really wanted this. *Grins evilly*)
stinkykitty : Taken
(This was suggested by me owing to certain odours being emitted by the person involved)
stinkykitteh : Available
(A variation based on LOLCats which my brother wanted to murder me about)
mybrotherisakitty : Available
(The above reaction was repeated again)

stupidlittlearse : Taken
(A rather surprising revelation, when we decided to indulge in profanities)
aceoffarts : Taken
(Another surprise, for obvious reasons)
aceofasses : Available
(A relief, of sorts, but the little chicken was too scared of what mummy would say although it was his decision that we try this out :P)
motorfart : Available
(A suggestion of mine which induced much laughter in us toilet-humour-driven souls, although it did not seem like an appropriate ID)
constipation : Taken
(Lo and behold! Weren't we surprised! And amused. xD)
idonthaveabackside : Available
(Thankfully. Yet, my brother found that he could not relate very well to this)
idonthaveanarse : Available
(We tried this one out for the sake of variety. It was discarded for the same lack of empathy)
shittykitty : No suggestions from Google
(They probably thought it way too inappropriate)
noreturntype : Available
(A suggestion of mine that the kid didn't like. The idiot)
nomorepoo : Taken
(More shocking revelations unfold! The Internet has too many similar minded perverts (ab)using it)
nomoretoilethumour : Available
(A product of sheer frustration on my part. It was scapped, most regretfully, in spite of its strong social comment)

thinkofsomething : Taken
(My brother's heartfelt plea to me)
numberXIII : Taken
(The chap could come up with nothing better on his own. *Shakes head regretfully*)
ihopenot : Available
(My response to the above suggestion)
thecatoftoday : Taken
(This would be the kid reverting to I-want-a-feline-ID mode)
darkraven : Taken
(Duh. I had told him it would be)
strawberryjam : Taken
(He wanted to kill me again after this one)
pikachu : Taken
(I wanted to kill him, after this)
To which, my brother suggested: "Pikapika?"
And my response was: X(

raisedeyebrow : Taken
(Sad, but)
skinnyarse : Taken
(I had a feeling it would be, but we laughed disgustingly nevertheless)
swelteringsands : Available
(I liked this one, but that fool did not. Still, IT SHALL BE MY USERNAME ONE DAY. NO ONE HAD BETTER STEAL IT, I AM WARNING YOU!!!!)
stinkysands : Available
(But then, my brother got insulted)

By this time I had suggested he try some of the word verifications that had made themselves visible to us: lentusil, tionotomm and mattassorse. But he disliked the idea. Meh.

We also tried these out...
soulpiper : Taken
(Hah. It would be)
soulreaper : Taken
(Double hah from my side)
sourfish : Taken
(Ok, I was amused)
sideprofile : Available!
(I had really really liked this one. *Sigh* NO ONE HAD BETTER STEAL THIS ONE EITHER)
dumbduck : Taken
(A product of my frustration at my brother not liking the previous one)
catmusic : Taken
(I had told him. The idiot never listens)
catastrophic : Taken
(Cliche, cliche, cliche, I had said)

iatemyowndna : AVAILABLE
(My own creative masterpiece, the virtues of which were woefully ignored)
sociozoid: Available
(My brother's stewed brain came up with this)
Inflated with the "Available" status, he suggested: flairazoid
To which I replied: That is STUPID! It sounds like a Pokemon! *shudder*
flamesoftime : Taken
(A sigh from him)
gigafire : Taken
(Another sigh from him)

And by then I was extremely annoyed with him and gave him an extremely filthy look when he suggested, "Terrorist?"
I responded with "vegetablepot", which was available.

Finally, the chap came up with something decent that was available, which I will not mention here, and created his account. I just want to mention this... whoever said that creating an email ID is easy, lied big time.