Date: 28.11.2009
Time: 10:20 a.m.
I asked for you the moment you were gone
You stayed back awhile, pondering perhaps,
Only to come laden with the hopes of Spring —
A return as short as season itself
Which so readily gave way to Summer.
I still asked, “Are you Winter?”
The scorching sun burned me in reply.
The year rolled by and I waited,
Waited for you to show some signs of existence,
Some signs of your return?
I had almost forgotten the feel
Of your electrifying touch on my skin —
How I’d feel your presence with every gusty wind
That blew across from you to me!
You made a woman wait, or hush!
Am I even a woman, or just a child who never grew up?
A child, who never stopped loving the warmth
That arose within as a rejoinder to your chill?
There are no snow-covered peaks where I live,
Yet I have terrace-tops from where I can sing,
Sit on a water tank, and be glad of the joy it brings.
I should have liked to jump delightedly
From one terrace-top to another,
Soar and exclaim the news of your arrival
Feeling nothing short of sheer bliss!
But we men and women have become unkind
For our terraces no longer entwine
And our buildings grow apart as do our hearts.
Winter! O Winter! Are you back as they all claim?
Sweet season, will you suffuse your characteristic cold,
While the heat of a warm heart still remains?
Will you bring those warm hearts closer or make them colder still?
But answer me, first, pray, “Are you Winter?”
Or are you just a figment of my dreamy soul,
As you were when I asked last Spring?
Winter! Love! Let not my passion drive you away —
It is through passion that I was born,
And only the most fervent passion that grips my soul
Can be the one which makes me die!
Stay, please! And love me the only way you can,
Surround my soul with your coldness
And let me thaw your defences from within.
Let me admire you in all your glory —
The glory of a landscape touched by your light,
Frail and dry from the outside, but teeming within with life,
I will become that little girl once again
Who would glide gracefully in the air,
Immersed in happiness that only a child can know,
Singing of Winter, in a land without snow.
End: 10:55 a.m.
Saturday, 28 November 2009
Monday, 9 November 2009
A Window to my World [VIII]
It would have been fun, and a departure from what I usually do when writing, to start this post with a quotation, but I truly cannot remember any at the moment. I've always been good at remembering the gist of things, never caring much for the exact words that people say (unless I absolutely want to, that is). Ah well, it works for me.
In any case, it has definitely been a while since I did one of my Window posts and today's amusement and (almost?) misadventures definitely merit a mention! Of course the day did start with The Curse of The Clumsy Hand, "wherin doth sit the dread and fear of" semi-blindness caused by a slight redness in the eye, which lead to me not wearing my contacts and fumbling for my sunscreen and accidentally dropping the container, incidentally made of glass on the floor. It had a lot of sunscreen left and I was rather heartbroken.
And then, while en route to college, an ambassador came and hit our car. I have a nagging illogical suspicion at the back of my head that this occurred because of my presence inside the car. Seeing how accident prone I have been throughout the day, I wouldn't doubt it. From the fact that I have posted here you can tell that the accident was nothing major... for us, at least. The poor car now has a rather badly battered bumper. I don't know why, but I feel very sorry for vehicles that suffer accidents. I remember once when I had been riding my bicycle and had had a speeding motorcycle take a turn from the wrong side of the road and collide with me, I was more saddened by the deplorable state of my much adored bike than the numerous cuts and bruises on myself. Oh and I also remember being annoyed at onlookers for peering at me as though I were bacteria growing on a petri dish... and waiting for me to cry, which I didn't! Ha!
I had fun at college today. Classes started a period later than usual so we were free to loll about in the canteen. It was there that I found myself getting increasingly obsessive about Tunir maa. Now before you start wondering about my inclinations, let me clarify that Tunir maa is a hit single from Bangladesh — with peppy "keora" music and rapping to boot! No, this is not a joke. It has one of the most profound lyrics possible — the tale of a young man (who happens to be a bit of a loafer but who are we to judge?) waiting to be noticed by his Lady Love, who has been disdainfully "dating marchhe"-ing other people but not noticing our young lovelorn hero...
And so, he embarks on a quest to win over his Lady Love by singing a "keora" song to his Lady Love's mother, promising her supari and paan, while dreaming of taking his Lady Love to a place where ice-cream and jhaal muri will be cheap. Now did I not tell you that it is profound? Thankfully the said protagonist was not pursuing me, since my mother most certainly would not have been swayed over to the other side by promises of supari and paan and the poor guy would have had to start singing sad simpering songs to convey his rejection. What a pity!
Now I cannot remember much of what happened during classes, owing mainly to the fact that I was terribly hungry throughout the day, but I do remember PB untying the knot at the back of my T-shirt (much to my embarrassment and displeasure) while I was walking towards the first class. And yes, she and RD and also threatened to molest me several times during the day! PB even went as far as to untie that particular knot yet again in the Metro station while we were returning home. Now while I have no qualms about my harem ladies being available to me whenever I require their services, I do not quite enjoy being subject to molestation on their part.
Another thing which had had me really intrigued was that I'd noticed Moods condoms being sold on the streets for the very first time. That this is a rather sad fact which proves me to have the maturity of a six-year-old was brought to my notice by Kaz, who very casually mentioned that condoms are sold everywhere and that I am a baby for noticing this for the first time. Let's just say that the thrill of knowledge and insight that I had experienced upon learning that condoms are sold by vendors who sell chocolates and deodorants and cigarette lighters was unceremoniously squashed. In the words of the KazMan, "Hey people do it, you know? These things are sold everywhere." When I offered to venture that I had seen them being sold in medicine shops, I was faced with an amused condescending chuckle. Why is it that boys always know so much about these matters?
However, as the evening draws to a close, I feel the contentment that a stomach filled with satisfyingly sumptuous masala corn (made by me) can bring to the soul. I am not even tempted to spoil my mood by being annoyed at the laundry lady for botching up the job of ironing a new top of mine. All is well when your stomach is full, it seems, oh yes! Tune in till next time, folks, it's LD out for now!
Saturday, 7 November 2009
Road To Wonderland
Date: 07.11.2009
Time: 10:25 p.m.
Fairy tales had always been such an important part of my childhood! Now don’t get me wrong, I am well acquainted with the rituals of reality to know that they are far from true. However, I always did have a world where I was free to be free and that is a choice I am grateful to have been given.
I believe it was my grandfather who first introduced me to the magic that lay in stories —where the rules of the real world did not always have to be followed. Monkeys and crocodiles could have meaningful business transactions just as easily as you and I, and you could always tell the antagonist apart from his or her cold calculating laugh. There were rules, yes, but most of the time, these were simple and more importantly, followed. You knew that the truth would triumph in the end, something that is in stark contrast to what happens in real life.
But then, I digress. What made me pause and wonder this evening was not how the world of fairy tales and children’s imagination lived by its ethical code, but whether I, given the right time and place, would also be able to offer another new soul a chance to discover the joys of the magical world that I loved so.
I was lucky enough to have people at home who would read to me as a child, people who would not think twice about letting text books lie unattended while letting me pore over brightly coloured skies — some of which were painted on paper and others painted in my mind. A good bedtime story was not just a way to get me to fall asleep, but the path to a mind that stayed rich and open while I dreamt of faraway lands. And not surprisingly, it was not long before I would spend many an hour by myself, lost in beautiful worlds yet to be seen by my eyes. These were worlds where I was free to decide how people laughed, how they saw life and how they cried. I loved it. I still do.
Yet, when I recall how everything started I can’t help but marvel at the charm that the talented storytellers of my early days possessed. To take a child and weave a whole new perspective for her to immerse herself in is no mean feat! This is especially true if the specimen concerned is one like me, with the tendency to get much too easily bored… and distracted.
I wonder then, if I will be able to carry on this fair tradition when my time comes. Will I remember the stories my grandfather told? Or will they be erased by time as I grow old?
End: 10:50 p.m.
Friday, 6 November 2009
And When...
Date: 06.11.2009
Time: 11:05 p.m.
And when an idle breeze is enough to make you fall
And when you feel too helpless to even scream
And when sullen skies stay severely soiled
And when words become enemies for they don't rhyme
When a whisper takes you back in time
To a distant past wrapped up in memory's foil,
How do you stop yourself from being embroiled
In the mousetrap life has set for you?
And when the trees flame red instead of green
And when you let burning branches scrape your knees
And when you want fresh scars to cover ones that can't heal
And when hope is wrapped up as chocolate you can't eat
When time is too short for you to complete
The argument being replayed inside your head,
How do you stop yourself from being rewound
As the damaged tape that never ends?
And when the happiest dawn is lost to a teary dusk
And when purple is gone and you have grey to fear
And when the floods wash away the numbness you love
And when the injury you thought had healed reappears
When the birds mourn the arrival of spring
Only to sing brightly when the forest is burnt,
How do you fix a world upside down
And learn to breathe in life once again?
End: 11:20 p.m.
Time: 11:05 p.m.
And when an idle breeze is enough to make you fall
And when you feel too helpless to even scream
And when sullen skies stay severely soiled
And when words become enemies for they don't rhyme
When a whisper takes you back in time
To a distant past wrapped up in memory's foil,
How do you stop yourself from being embroiled
In the mousetrap life has set for you?
And when the trees flame red instead of green
And when you let burning branches scrape your knees
And when you want fresh scars to cover ones that can't heal
And when hope is wrapped up as chocolate you can't eat
When time is too short for you to complete
The argument being replayed inside your head,
How do you stop yourself from being rewound
As the damaged tape that never ends?
And when the happiest dawn is lost to a teary dusk
And when purple is gone and you have grey to fear
And when the floods wash away the numbness you love
And when the injury you thought had healed reappears
When the birds mourn the arrival of spring
Only to sing brightly when the forest is burnt,
How do you fix a world upside down
And learn to breathe in life once again?
End: 11:20 p.m.
Tuesday, 3 November 2009
Champagne Supernova
I went home directly after college ended after a very long time. Now for me to explain why that is significant would most certainly take an immensely long time, however, to cut a long story short, it was because I was involved in a college theatre production.
For quite some time it had become a daily ritual for all of us to assemble near the auditorium and chill out for a moment or two before practice started in earnest. It was fun. Lots of fun, and now that our shows (which were greatly enjoyed by everyone) have ended, it is as though a vacuum has settled into our lives. Today, a part of our massive group had gathered in the canteen before classes started and all we could say to each other was, "You zast don't know it! Zanti paro na!"
It is weird to think that all of us won't be creating chaos en masse or hollering loudly the way we had grown so used to any more. I'd done my share of complaining about the late hours and the toll everything was taking on my health. Still, I know I'm not the only one who will miss every moment of Practice. Sigh.
On a brighter note, I've been in high spirits (no pun intended) throughout the day! It was with a bubbly phone conversation that I started my day and not even the sudden thundershower could dampen my cheerfulness. Although I have ample reason to be annoyed with most members of the male species for their horrible hobbies of randomly linking people up for the heck of it, today has been a good day.
It was great to have the professor who was taking the first class of the day congratulate us about our performance. The random hilarity that followed next can be recalled only with the widest of grins! There was this terribly obscene song I heard today regarding the gluteus maximus that I took great pleasure in singing to MMM. The poor girl tried to seek comfort from DM, but she joined in as well and we both had great fun as our singing was accompanied by rather rude pointed gestures. It was insanely hilarious!
Apart from that I believe I gave RD a fake hickey by scribbling on her arm with a purple pen. She tried very hard to remove the doodles and ended up looking as though someone had given her arm a lot of attention (evil grin). After seeing this, I'd also wanted to doodle near her neck, but sadly, she wouldn't let me. During break I ate up all the cheese sandwiches that BC (that does not stand for what you perverts think!) had brought for tiffin. And I think that I was very randomly mad throughout the day, so much, in fact that a classmate commented that she hadn't seen me in such a bright mood for a really long time. For some reason though, I can't remember all my crazy activities clearly enough.
Oh but what I do remember is gorging on street food with friends after classes ended! We had everything from aloo chaat to jhaal muri to golgappas to kulfis to multicoloured candy floss! If I'd had chocolates as well I'm sure be on a sugar high right now. In any case, the lot of us really enjoyed ourselves even though we missed going for Practice.
I didn't pay any attention in any of my classes today and was totally zoned out. But the good part was that I had lots of fun. I guess that sometimes it is alright to simply live in the moment after all!
Tuesday, 20 October 2009
As The Season Speaks
The morning says that winter may have arrived, or in the least, is slowly creeping towards our lives. The scorching summer afternoon has been washed away by the rains and what is left now is the soft tender touch of the cold about to greet us in the coming months. There is a lot of life to see yet, and as I feel the need to live more strongly everyday, each passing season breathes its own elixir into my being.
The truth is that rediscovering yourself takes time. It does not happen in a month, or perhaps even a year. And at times you do feel that you just hit the same roadblock yet again. Then again, all I have to do to let my soul sing synchronously with the universe is to just let it be... It does not take that much effort to feel after all!
Saturday, 17 October 2009
Oddball Eccentricities
Date: 17.10.2009
Time: 5:55 p.m.
I suffer not, I tell you, from unrequited love
More inclined to die from stomach cramps, am I
And while I wilt with the wind blowing on a hot summer day
I will walk against a storm in peace.
Without a worthy adversary to take my boredom away
I may laze in the sun all day
And though a few stray challenges may come by my way
They shall have naught the power to sway.
My love for the world is unsettled enough
For me to curse and admire both
I may charm and be charmed and be equally at ease
With kindness and ferocity.
I wonder most about the light,
What lets the moon be so alluringly bright!
About the shimmering waves and the ships they crunch,
And the ice-cream that I may have had for lunch…
My tastes aren’t simple at all, to say the least
And while they do change with my many eccentricities
I am content enough to face writer’s block
Until a day comes when my world is rudely stopped.
And as I write to distract myself from pain
The simplest of facts does indeed remain —
There was no need for this mischievous dove
To begin this tale with a mention of love.
End: 6:20 p.m.
Time: 5:55 p.m.
I suffer not, I tell you, from unrequited love
More inclined to die from stomach cramps, am I
And while I wilt with the wind blowing on a hot summer day
I will walk against a storm in peace.
Without a worthy adversary to take my boredom away
I may laze in the sun all day
And though a few stray challenges may come by my way
They shall have naught the power to sway.
My love for the world is unsettled enough
For me to curse and admire both
I may charm and be charmed and be equally at ease
With kindness and ferocity.
I wonder most about the light,
What lets the moon be so alluringly bright!
About the shimmering waves and the ships they crunch,
And the ice-cream that I may have had for lunch…
My tastes aren’t simple at all, to say the least
And while they do change with my many eccentricities
I am content enough to face writer’s block
Until a day comes when my world is rudely stopped.
And as I write to distract myself from pain
The simplest of facts does indeed remain —
There was no need for this mischievous dove
To begin this tale with a mention of love.
End: 6:20 p.m.
Friday, 16 October 2009
Dreamy Interlude
Date: 15.10.2009
Time: 11:30 p.m.
You might find trinkets lying about
Cluttered dutifully inside my head,
Colours swarming into souls
Collected gladly and easily bled -
Each vision a spectacle of light
Each memory a triumph of sight,
By nightfall it always seems sure
To be with me for evermore.
I sing along to an amethyst's tune
And let it enchant the purple in me,
Soak my soul with wanderlust raw
Only to yearn my utmost to be free
I lose my mind over motorbike boots
Lose my heart to forbidden fruits
Dance along to Calypso's beat
The moon bearing witness to my defeat.
So I place my soul in the hands of midnight
And stare away into the moonlight
Swayed by a soothing sonata
That gushes into a quivering toccata!
My thoughts blend gracefully into notes
As my heart rises and gleefully floats
The music filling chasms within my soul
And healing and making me whole.
End: 00:30 p.m.
Time: 11:30 p.m.
You might find trinkets lying about
Cluttered dutifully inside my head,
Colours swarming into souls
Collected gladly and easily bled -
Each vision a spectacle of light
Each memory a triumph of sight,
By nightfall it always seems sure
To be with me for evermore.
I sing along to an amethyst's tune
And let it enchant the purple in me,
Soak my soul with wanderlust raw
Only to yearn my utmost to be free
I lose my mind over motorbike boots
Lose my heart to forbidden fruits
Dance along to Calypso's beat
The moon bearing witness to my defeat.
So I place my soul in the hands of midnight
And stare away into the moonlight
Swayed by a soothing sonata
That gushes into a quivering toccata!
My thoughts blend gracefully into notes
As my heart rises and gleefully floats
The music filling chasms within my soul
And healing and making me whole.
End: 00:30 p.m.
Wednesday, 30 September 2009
Write
There is no need. Absolutely no need. None at all. At this moment when I let words flow from my fingertips instead of my lips, I know that there is no need for anything else. People can knock on as many doors as they would like, be as boorish as possible and break them down if they'd like, but no, it would not matter.
For I can write. And I will write. Someway or another.
For I can write. And I will write. Someway or another.
Sunday, 13 September 2009
Phlegmatic Discourse
Date: 13.09.2009
Time: 12:55p.m.
Life without the Internet is, in short, harrowing. For a person who would spend all her evening hours from seven to twelve online on a daily basis, fighting for Internet time with too-Internet-savvy-for-their-own-good family members can hardly be called light evening entertainment. Add to that mix a mother who insists that she will look you up on Facebook, and a father who refuses to let you get a net connection of your own but will disrupt the little time that you do get online and what you get is irritation of epic proportions – such great proportions that you stop going online at all and let the blog of your life remain uncared for and unattended for months.
And then there are the viruses. I get sick at this time of the year every single year. It is as though the viruses regard my body cells as their perfect pre-Puja holiday destination. After about a week of keeping me very ill, when they find that their welcome has turned cold, they are chased away by bed-rest, only to return the next year with equal enthusiasm.
This year there are mid-terms as well, and I won’t bring the issue of how many marks they are for so that my blood pressure remains under control. Yes, college has been giving me hypertension ever since the new management took over and insisted upon inflicting a ridiculous number of even more ridiculous rules upon us students. Dreary, the experience has been, and I cannot wait for the few years that are left to be over soon.
There is an exam tomorrow, of course. Otherwise I would certainly not have been so desperate to write as to break my over-a-month-long vow of literary silence. Not that it was voluntary, but well, I don’t feel like uploading my blog much using Opera Mini, that’s all. It is not as much fun as the ‘normal’ way when I would get to respond to comments and browse through other blogs as much as I’d wanted. Sigh.
I’ve decided to bake lots of chocolate cake during the holidays. I will be trying to bribe my father with these so that he’ll be more amenable to me getting my own net connection (which I will insist on paying for) so that I am given the privacy to work in peace. I hope my plan works! Till then, it is back to Immunology. LD out!
End: 1:10 p.m.
PS: My birthday (about a month back) was loads of fun! It was much, much better than last year’s when I had a raging temperature on the day itself. I had a great time, was treated like royalty by loved ones, pampered as hell (a rarity, that) and wasn’t much too bothered by what I could not have. :D Since I couldn’t update last month, I’ll do it now as I want there to be a reminder. :]
Time: 12:55p.m.
Life without the Internet is, in short, harrowing. For a person who would spend all her evening hours from seven to twelve online on a daily basis, fighting for Internet time with too-Internet-savvy-for-their-own-good family members can hardly be called light evening entertainment. Add to that mix a mother who insists that she will look you up on Facebook, and a father who refuses to let you get a net connection of your own but will disrupt the little time that you do get online and what you get is irritation of epic proportions – such great proportions that you stop going online at all and let the blog of your life remain uncared for and unattended for months.
And then there are the viruses. I get sick at this time of the year every single year. It is as though the viruses regard my body cells as their perfect pre-Puja holiday destination. After about a week of keeping me very ill, when they find that their welcome has turned cold, they are chased away by bed-rest, only to return the next year with equal enthusiasm.
This year there are mid-terms as well, and I won’t bring the issue of how many marks they are for so that my blood pressure remains under control. Yes, college has been giving me hypertension ever since the new management took over and insisted upon inflicting a ridiculous number of even more ridiculous rules upon us students. Dreary, the experience has been, and I cannot wait for the few years that are left to be over soon.
There is an exam tomorrow, of course. Otherwise I would certainly not have been so desperate to write as to break my over-a-month-long vow of literary silence. Not that it was voluntary, but well, I don’t feel like uploading my blog much using Opera Mini, that’s all. It is not as much fun as the ‘normal’ way when I would get to respond to comments and browse through other blogs as much as I’d wanted. Sigh.
I’ve decided to bake lots of chocolate cake during the holidays. I will be trying to bribe my father with these so that he’ll be more amenable to me getting my own net connection (which I will insist on paying for) so that I am given the privacy to work in peace. I hope my plan works! Till then, it is back to Immunology. LD out!
End: 1:10 p.m.
PS: My birthday (about a month back) was loads of fun! It was much, much better than last year’s when I had a raging temperature on the day itself. I had a great time, was treated like royalty by loved ones, pampered as hell (a rarity, that) and wasn’t much too bothered by what I could not have. :D Since I couldn’t update last month, I’ll do it now as I want there to be a reminder. :]
Saturday, 4 July 2009
Moonstruck
Date: 04.07.2009
Time: 7:25 p.m.
On a darkened leaden evening
As I looked out through a two-way glass
A lidded moon stared back through the clouds
And drew my heart away from the earth
I noticed the star perched above
A streaming mass of white
And wondered why I was anywhere but
A rooftop, watching it smile
All pangs of hunger lay forgotten
With supper getting cold
As I wished to engage in a sprightly dance
Before it glowed bright gold.
Could it be, could it be
Did I fly with the breeze
Did I twirl with my feet upon clouds?
Did I breathe, did I breathe
As my heart sang with such ease
And I felt icicles tickling my toes?
Was it love, was it hope
Was it a dream where the moon spoke
Had the cloud-horses really traipsed across the sky?
Was it me, was it me
Who glided forward with such glee
Sliding off the back of a moonstruck doe?
I dare not shut my eyes now for fear
As I do not want this gleaming vision to disappear
But I am back on my knees, peering out through the trees
Hoping for another magical two-way glass.
End: 7:50 p.m.
Time: 7:25 p.m.
On a darkened leaden evening
As I looked out through a two-way glass
A lidded moon stared back through the clouds
And drew my heart away from the earth
I noticed the star perched above
A streaming mass of white
And wondered why I was anywhere but
A rooftop, watching it smile
All pangs of hunger lay forgotten
With supper getting cold
As I wished to engage in a sprightly dance
Before it glowed bright gold.
Could it be, could it be
Did I fly with the breeze
Did I twirl with my feet upon clouds?
Did I breathe, did I breathe
As my heart sang with such ease
And I felt icicles tickling my toes?
Was it love, was it hope
Was it a dream where the moon spoke
Had the cloud-horses really traipsed across the sky?
Was it me, was it me
Who glided forward with such glee
Sliding off the back of a moonstruck doe?
I dare not shut my eyes now for fear
As I do not want this gleaming vision to disappear
But I am back on my knees, peering out through the trees
Hoping for another magical two-way glass.
End: 7:50 p.m.
Wednesday, 17 June 2009
The Passing
Date: 17.06.2009
Time: 6:05 p.m.
The sounds emitted by my lips
Are mute when it comes to pain
I sneer at the storm which lashes within
And regard it with disdain
The gale threatens to knock down walls
Imposed by my bitter pride
It only echoes my insolent rage
Not the cold resolve I hide
I’ve masked the pain in hidden rhymes
Scribbled despair into ink
Moulded sorrow into lines and hashes
Which form figures on the brink,
I sat by the shore yesterday
Reading his last words to me
My eyes were red but dry as I recalled
How he was lost to the sea
I fear not gusts that spray my sails
With watery wreaths of death
Nor do I dread the chill that descends
When waves chafe against my breath
I know I shall be swallowed soon…
Before the last raindrop falls
To become a part of a common graveyard
And answer my lover’s call.
End: 7:00 p.m.
PS: I started out with a few words in my head and came up with this. I don't think I've posted fictional poetry here before, have I? Something different, something new for the blog then! :)
Time: 6:05 p.m.
The sounds emitted by my lips
Are mute when it comes to pain
I sneer at the storm which lashes within
And regard it with disdain
The gale threatens to knock down walls
Imposed by my bitter pride
It only echoes my insolent rage
Not the cold resolve I hide
I’ve masked the pain in hidden rhymes
Scribbled despair into ink
Moulded sorrow into lines and hashes
Which form figures on the brink,
I sat by the shore yesterday
Reading his last words to me
My eyes were red but dry as I recalled
How he was lost to the sea
I fear not gusts that spray my sails
With watery wreaths of death
Nor do I dread the chill that descends
When waves chafe against my breath
I know I shall be swallowed soon…
Before the last raindrop falls
To become a part of a common graveyard
And answer my lover’s call.
End: 7:00 p.m.
PS: I started out with a few words in my head and came up with this. I don't think I've posted fictional poetry here before, have I? Something different, something new for the blog then! :)
Cracked Up (Coloured)
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This would be the first time I have tried colouring anything in Photoshop... And I dare say it does not look bad at all. No, it wasn't done today, in fact, I'd meant to upload it last month itself but not having a net connection most of the time played spoilsport.
I'm feeling a little ambitious right now so yes, people, prints are available if you're interested! (This one is smaller than the original). Drop in a comment and I'll tell you how to contact me. And since I get a copy of all comments delivered to an old mailbox (unless it acts up, of course) you can also leave your email address and delete the comment if you're concerned about privacy. :)
I'd made another pen and ink doodle a few days back but I'll wait for my best friend's exams to get over so that I can have it scanned instead of just taking a stupid picture using a low-res camera. Sniff. How I long for so many things! Oh well.
Faith
Date: 15.06.2009
Time: 10:00 p.m.
It’s been a good two years
And friend, I wish you well
Wherever you go,
Wherever you dwell
You’ve stood by strange times
And a sinking ship full of sorrows
It’s now time to part ways
With our mingled ’morrows
Yet, although our paths seem
Destined to diverge
I have faith that we’ll find
A way to make them converge
From this point, my friend,
We’ll no longer depend
On that which is audible
To understand or comprehend,
For the tangible ties
Are all we have left
And feel them strongly, we must
Ere there be any cleft
Between our entwined souls
Shared with all sympathy
Joined in the most beautiful bond
Of a friend’s empathy,
It is hardest to let go
When you know things will change
But whether it is for the better
Is within our hands to arrange
It’s been a good two years
And friend, I wish you well
I’ll keep you in my thoughts
Wherever you dwell.
End: 10:10 p.m.
Time: 10:00 p.m.
It’s been a good two years
And friend, I wish you well
Wherever you go,
Wherever you dwell
You’ve stood by strange times
And a sinking ship full of sorrows
It’s now time to part ways
With our mingled ’morrows
Yet, although our paths seem
Destined to diverge
I have faith that we’ll find
A way to make them converge
From this point, my friend,
We’ll no longer depend
On that which is audible
To understand or comprehend,
For the tangible ties
Are all we have left
And feel them strongly, we must
Ere there be any cleft
Between our entwined souls
Shared with all sympathy
Joined in the most beautiful bond
Of a friend’s empathy,
It is hardest to let go
When you know things will change
But whether it is for the better
Is within our hands to arrange
It’s been a good two years
And friend, I wish you well
I’ll keep you in my thoughts
Wherever you dwell.
End: 10:10 p.m.
Friday, 29 May 2009
A Fool's Luck
Date: 29.05.2009
Time: 5:58 p.m.
End: 6:19 p.m.
Time: 5:58 p.m.
Things have not been going particularly well. The last few months have been strange and hard and there have been changes at home. A cyclone had come by our place, not recently, but two months ago. We are one member short now and although everyone is going about their lives as best as they can, the house does feel a lot more empty. It’s indeed funny how one occupied corner could make it look fuller.
In any case, my luck cycle is at its all time low and I don’t recount a previous occasion when it had been this bad for such a long stretch of time. I have grumbled a lot and been annoyed at many people for numerous reasons. The strangest thing, however, is how wondrously so many threads that I held securely in my palm once upon a time, have disintegrated and left behind only dust. And I don’t know if that is a situation where the blaming game has any role to play.
There is one relationship that I thought absolutely secure as a child, which is growing steadily worse. New strength and ties have been discovered in another, yet there are so many other ties that reek only of disappointment. I am not sure if it is wrong to expect a certain level of respect and understanding. Maybe it is; which is why those closest to me disappoint me so. I guess I hope for too much.
On a comparatively less grave note, the lizard problem plaguing me has reached such a high that there are too many of them now for me to be scared. I have taken to watching them idly when I am reclining on the rocking chair in one room, or a sofa in another. Just this evening, I was aimless enough to watch an adult lizard await its lady (or should it be ‘lizardly’?) love outside a bookshelf crevice close to the ceiling. I am certain that this occupation would not have arisen had I not had so many examinations to sit for.
Speaking of which, a part of today’s torture session left me with the desire to curse my torturer with the most prolonged and painful death. However, I would rather not dwell on this debacle for there are certainly many more to come. Perhaps relief will show itself one fine rainy day when I truly get to believe that all will be well. It’s back to the grind till then.
In any case, my luck cycle is at its all time low and I don’t recount a previous occasion when it had been this bad for such a long stretch of time. I have grumbled a lot and been annoyed at many people for numerous reasons. The strangest thing, however, is how wondrously so many threads that I held securely in my palm once upon a time, have disintegrated and left behind only dust. And I don’t know if that is a situation where the blaming game has any role to play.
There is one relationship that I thought absolutely secure as a child, which is growing steadily worse. New strength and ties have been discovered in another, yet there are so many other ties that reek only of disappointment. I am not sure if it is wrong to expect a certain level of respect and understanding. Maybe it is; which is why those closest to me disappoint me so. I guess I hope for too much.
On a comparatively less grave note, the lizard problem plaguing me has reached such a high that there are too many of them now for me to be scared. I have taken to watching them idly when I am reclining on the rocking chair in one room, or a sofa in another. Just this evening, I was aimless enough to watch an adult lizard await its lady (or should it be ‘lizardly’?) love outside a bookshelf crevice close to the ceiling. I am certain that this occupation would not have arisen had I not had so many examinations to sit for.
Speaking of which, a part of today’s torture session left me with the desire to curse my torturer with the most prolonged and painful death. However, I would rather not dwell on this debacle for there are certainly many more to come. Perhaps relief will show itself one fine rainy day when I truly get to believe that all will be well. It’s back to the grind till then.
End: 6:19 p.m.
Thursday, 14 May 2009
Out of a Summerian Haze
Date: 14.05.2009
Time: 8:35 p.m.
So here I am, after almost a month, sitting at the comp. and writing about how I have been. It’s a rather vague question with a vague answer unless chronologically put. I haven’t had any time to write much or do anything constructive apart from appearing for one exam after another, which in my book, does not count as constructive. And they aren’t over yet. I’m just ‘lucky’ to have a shortish gap now with more ‘in-between’ gaps coming up that will make sure that my exams, which began in the beginning of May, will go on till the first week of June. Bugger.
But enough said about exams and how they’ve been annoying me to no end. I voted for the first time yesterday along with the rest of the city. And I won’t say anything else about that matter. Last night’s thunderstorm (I’ve been told that it was early in the morning and not at night, but I shall still say last night because I’d only just been able to fall asleep when the thunderclouds roared from afar) and the showers that the city experienced recently have finally ensured that I, along with the rest of us, am no longer ‘in a summerian haze’ but coming out of one instead. Thankfully. I don’t know when I’d last melted to this degree (no puns intended). Never, perhaps.
In any case, I haven’t felt the least bit inspired in a while and that itself should become gloomy enough a fact to become a source of inspiration soon enough. Sad, really, that I have to resort to this to get myself to write something. It’s the exams, I’ll harp. It’s the heat, I’ll whine… but to no avail. I’ve hated almost everything about this semester in college, starting from the downright horrid timetable to the abominable amounts my class had to study for each paper, from the abominable teaching in such a lot of the papers to the insane idea on behalf of the management to not give us any study leave. And yes, I am ranting about the exams again since I am just that effed up about them. Had one today, so.
Oh well, there have been good moments when I’ve had wonderfully stimulating conversations (oh I make it sound like I had some splendid tea) and managed to get away from the terrible grind with excellent company. It’s kept me alive so far and I hope that happy fact won’t change much, to the extent that I am rather looking forward to tomorrow. Oh but that will be another story.
One not so random thing that has been bothering me a lot lately is that there are just too many baby lizards scurrying around everywhere. I mean, even a few weeks back, I was under the impression that there was just one baby lizard on the drawing room wall. I wasn’t too pleased about its existence, given my love for lizards, but hey, it was just one measly little thing which I was hoping would choke itself to death everyday that I saw it. Imagine my condition when one fine evening I saw that there were three! All of the same size and equally disturbing to look at! I’d even encountered a big, fat, horrid and ugly one in the tiny bathroom adjoined to my room. It hid, goodness knows where, when I saw it and screamed loudly. Since then I’ve been spotting hidden lizards everywhere and have been rather neurotic about the lot. I wonder now if it is the lizard breeding season.
On a pleasant note, however, my balcony has been cleaned up after I campaigned for almost six months (to Dad) to have it cleaned. And I have taken it upon myself to feed all the little birds in the neighbourhood that can fit through the grills and find their way to food and water kept for them. Little sparrows have been flocking to the balcony by the dozen ever since and they chirp ever so cutely whenever they find food kept for them. They’re rather partial to cream cracker biscuits and fight over the large pieces. I’ve seen them hop and eat through a very slightly parted door. Another heartening thing is that there is a mynah nest on the air conditioner right across and the proud parents often come to the balcony for a bite. Yes, I have been birdwatching a lot. I’d even spotted a tailor bird one day! It was tiny. And very, very cute.
I’ll be very delighted once my exams are over and I’m free to spend the entire day watching these exquisitely adorable creatures. I’d even like to get hold of some potted plants… we haven’t had potted plants in the balcony in years. Wish me luck for the rest of the exams!
End: 9:05 p.m.
Time: 8:35 p.m.
So here I am, after almost a month, sitting at the comp. and writing about how I have been. It’s a rather vague question with a vague answer unless chronologically put. I haven’t had any time to write much or do anything constructive apart from appearing for one exam after another, which in my book, does not count as constructive. And they aren’t over yet. I’m just ‘lucky’ to have a shortish gap now with more ‘in-between’ gaps coming up that will make sure that my exams, which began in the beginning of May, will go on till the first week of June. Bugger.
But enough said about exams and how they’ve been annoying me to no end. I voted for the first time yesterday along with the rest of the city. And I won’t say anything else about that matter. Last night’s thunderstorm (I’ve been told that it was early in the morning and not at night, but I shall still say last night because I’d only just been able to fall asleep when the thunderclouds roared from afar) and the showers that the city experienced recently have finally ensured that I, along with the rest of us, am no longer ‘in a summerian haze’ but coming out of one instead. Thankfully. I don’t know when I’d last melted to this degree (no puns intended). Never, perhaps.
In any case, I haven’t felt the least bit inspired in a while and that itself should become gloomy enough a fact to become a source of inspiration soon enough. Sad, really, that I have to resort to this to get myself to write something. It’s the exams, I’ll harp. It’s the heat, I’ll whine… but to no avail. I’ve hated almost everything about this semester in college, starting from the downright horrid timetable to the abominable amounts my class had to study for each paper, from the abominable teaching in such a lot of the papers to the insane idea on behalf of the management to not give us any study leave. And yes, I am ranting about the exams again since I am just that effed up about them. Had one today, so.
Oh well, there have been good moments when I’ve had wonderfully stimulating conversations (oh I make it sound like I had some splendid tea) and managed to get away from the terrible grind with excellent company. It’s kept me alive so far and I hope that happy fact won’t change much, to the extent that I am rather looking forward to tomorrow. Oh but that will be another story.
One not so random thing that has been bothering me a lot lately is that there are just too many baby lizards scurrying around everywhere. I mean, even a few weeks back, I was under the impression that there was just one baby lizard on the drawing room wall. I wasn’t too pleased about its existence, given my love for lizards, but hey, it was just one measly little thing which I was hoping would choke itself to death everyday that I saw it. Imagine my condition when one fine evening I saw that there were three! All of the same size and equally disturbing to look at! I’d even encountered a big, fat, horrid and ugly one in the tiny bathroom adjoined to my room. It hid, goodness knows where, when I saw it and screamed loudly. Since then I’ve been spotting hidden lizards everywhere and have been rather neurotic about the lot. I wonder now if it is the lizard breeding season.
On a pleasant note, however, my balcony has been cleaned up after I campaigned for almost six months (to Dad) to have it cleaned. And I have taken it upon myself to feed all the little birds in the neighbourhood that can fit through the grills and find their way to food and water kept for them. Little sparrows have been flocking to the balcony by the dozen ever since and they chirp ever so cutely whenever they find food kept for them. They’re rather partial to cream cracker biscuits and fight over the large pieces. I’ve seen them hop and eat through a very slightly parted door. Another heartening thing is that there is a mynah nest on the air conditioner right across and the proud parents often come to the balcony for a bite. Yes, I have been birdwatching a lot. I’d even spotted a tailor bird one day! It was tiny. And very, very cute.
I’ll be very delighted once my exams are over and I’m free to spend the entire day watching these exquisitely adorable creatures. I’d even like to get hold of some potted plants… we haven’t had potted plants in the balcony in years. Wish me luck for the rest of the exams!
End: 9:05 p.m.
Wednesday, 15 April 2009
Cracked Up
This would be another pen and ink doodle made last night. I absolutely hate the fact that I lack a scanner and need to take pictures using a low resolution camera. :| Waiting for feedback!
PS: Shubho naboborsho to all the Bongs!
Tuesday, 14 April 2009
Floral Wall
I made this wallpaper (1600 x 1200) this afternoon after taking a picture of my mattress using the phone camera. :P It's basically photo-manipulated in Photoshop.Saturday, 11 April 2009
Happy Birthday Pweencie!
Yes so this is the Birthday post Prince Kazarelth of Fealdamar has requested. As Supreme Commander of the Penguin Army to which he belongs, I could not deny this vassal's request. So here it is:
HAPPY BIRTHDAY PWEENCIE! Have an awesome year ahead, may life keep looking better and better with every day and may you be fulfilled in every way! :]
Here's wishing a wonderful birthday to an awesome friend!
PS: Pweencie promises not to get miffed at being called Pweencie. Right? :P
HAPPY BIRTHDAY PWEENCIE! Have an awesome year ahead, may life keep looking better and better with every day and may you be fulfilled in every way! :]
Here's wishing a wonderful birthday to an awesome friend!
PS: Pweencie promises not to get miffed at being called Pweencie. Right? :P
Saturday, 28 March 2009
Little Bird
I was kissed by the petals of Spring
When a chill stole away its warmth
I had learnt to leap into sunlight
When I learnt I had grief unfulfilled
So beloved was I of sorrow
And sorrow most beloved of mine
That it spared me not from its shadow
As I was slowly spreading my wings,
It let me soar up into the bright sky
But only when it was night
Speaking gently to the starlight
Whispering with the moon's wan light
I could delight in the bejewelled wonders
Until I rose and flew too far
Upon which grief would call unto me
Reminding me of tears I had left to cry,
The oceans would weep with me
If the waters weren't reigned in by pride
Candid tears would flow most freely
If only they were mine to shed
I could only watch while others wept
And had sorrow flow out of their way
While grief accrued within my heart
Darkening my light and all that I see,
Yet I wonder if I'd know and still
Believe I am loved by Spring
For the joy of life and the urge to live
Have imbued my spirits with a fiery zeal
I wonder now if it is alright
To grieve and still know how to smile
To love what is gone yet let it go
And strive for those dizzying heights,
I would like to live in spite of death
For all the love given to me
Respect my grief but not be enslaved
And instead set myself free
The stars are mine to sing to with fire
And caress with my wingtips
The free little bird must awaken again
And return Spring's sweet kiss.
When a chill stole away its warmth
I had learnt to leap into sunlight
When I learnt I had grief unfulfilled
So beloved was I of sorrow
And sorrow most beloved of mine
That it spared me not from its shadow
As I was slowly spreading my wings,
It let me soar up into the bright sky
But only when it was night
Speaking gently to the starlight
Whispering with the moon's wan light
I could delight in the bejewelled wonders
Until I rose and flew too far
Upon which grief would call unto me
Reminding me of tears I had left to cry,
The oceans would weep with me
If the waters weren't reigned in by pride
Candid tears would flow most freely
If only they were mine to shed
I could only watch while others wept
And had sorrow flow out of their way
While grief accrued within my heart
Darkening my light and all that I see,
Yet I wonder if I'd know and still
Believe I am loved by Spring
For the joy of life and the urge to live
Have imbued my spirits with a fiery zeal
I wonder now if it is alright
To grieve and still know how to smile
To love what is gone yet let it go
And strive for those dizzying heights,
I would like to live in spite of death
For all the love given to me
Respect my grief but not be enslaved
And instead set myself free
The stars are mine to sing to with fire
And caress with my wingtips
The free little bird must awaken again
And return Spring's sweet kiss.
Friday, 20 March 2009
Lost Goodbye
Anya watched as she saw her grandfather being carried away in a stretcher, and she wondered if she would ever see him again. She also wondered if she would miss him if he weren’t to return.
Anya had been crying herself to sleep when she was stirred awake by the sounds. There was a lot of movement in the house. All the grown-ups had the same look on their faces — they looked worried and looked like they were trying to hide it. She had heard about widows, and had heard people talk sympathetically about them. Her six year old mind could not understand what all the fuss was about. She certainly never wanted to be one. But today, she wondered whether she would find her grandmother draped in white sooner than she’d thought.
Her grandfather had grunted feebly while being helped into the stretcher. He had also been strapped, so that he didn’t fall off, her father said. Still, the constraints disturbed Anya and she wondered again whether they would make her grandfather not wish to return.
She wanted to get back to sleep, get back to the time when she pulled her teddy-bears by their ears and dragged them across the floor. And she certainly did not like the grim, quiet pallor that had descended upon everyone’s faces. Within all the commotion, she knew, and she was okay with her grandfather not coming back. She had decided that she wouldn’t miss him after all, especially since he never stopped her grandmother from kicking the baby in a fit of rage or sending a plateful of food flying to the floor in a hasty tantrum. Such men were not to be depended upon, she thought.
Anya wanted to slip away quietly without anyone noticing. But she didn’t notice the old French window left wide open beside her. With one small footstep towards her left, she tumbled, and never returned.
Anya had been crying herself to sleep when she was stirred awake by the sounds. There was a lot of movement in the house. All the grown-ups had the same look on their faces — they looked worried and looked like they were trying to hide it. She had heard about widows, and had heard people talk sympathetically about them. Her six year old mind could not understand what all the fuss was about. She certainly never wanted to be one. But today, she wondered whether she would find her grandmother draped in white sooner than she’d thought.
Her grandfather had grunted feebly while being helped into the stretcher. He had also been strapped, so that he didn’t fall off, her father said. Still, the constraints disturbed Anya and she wondered again whether they would make her grandfather not wish to return.
She wanted to get back to sleep, get back to the time when she pulled her teddy-bears by their ears and dragged them across the floor. And she certainly did not like the grim, quiet pallor that had descended upon everyone’s faces. Within all the commotion, she knew, and she was okay with her grandfather not coming back. She had decided that she wouldn’t miss him after all, especially since he never stopped her grandmother from kicking the baby in a fit of rage or sending a plateful of food flying to the floor in a hasty tantrum. Such men were not to be depended upon, she thought.
Anya wanted to slip away quietly without anyone noticing. But she didn’t notice the old French window left wide open beside her. With one small footstep towards her left, she tumbled, and never returned.
Wednesday, 11 March 2009
Leafy Sprinkle
For some reason I was in a pretty creative mood today. Of course, it is quite likely that Internals and the need to study for them is the real reason behind that. I've noticed that I feel the greatest urge to write, sing or even draw during exams. I wrote today after ages... something too personal for the blog. However, there is this bit of digital art I made later in the evening.
It is 600 x 600 pixels and completely digital, with practically no stock picture, made using Photoshop, which I hardly know anything of. All said and done I think it would make a neat CD label. Feedback is welcome. :)
It is 600 x 600 pixels and completely digital, with practically no stock picture, made using Photoshop, which I hardly know anything of. All said and done I think it would make a neat CD label. Feedback is welcome. :)
Monday, 2 March 2009
LA-isms
The visiting lecturer who takes Physics with my class this semester has absolutely no idea that she is teaching a class full of perverts, especially a majority of perverted girls. (RD, sitting to my left today, actually exclaimed, albeit to herself and me, “Ma’am, we are perverts!”) Neither does she realize what she says at certain points of times. Today’s class itself resulted in my frantic note taking, which should be read as frantic quote taking as the Ladies of the Last Row laughed themselves silly over all that was spoken. Suffice to say, I did not learn much Physics today.
12:26 p.m.
LA: (to the class) If you mumble like a penguin no one will hear you.
{This was accompanied by significant hand gestures reminiscent of the times when, as kindergarteners, I was taught the greater than and less than signs.}
1:10 p.m.
LA: Ummmnh? What will I cover? When will I cover?
{I refuse to cite the reference and spoil the effect the above has on pervy minds.}
1:15 p.m.
LA: When I am giving you a flavour of everything, I am not asking you to cook it, I am asking you to taste it... Don’t worry it is very interesting.
{The above clause applies here as well xP.}
1:25 p.m.
Class: (owing to very faint scribbles on the whiteboard) Ma’am, we can’t see.
LA: (very earnestly) Imagine.
1:45 p.m.
LA: How many of you have microwaves at home? Ok. When you use a microwave, what have you experienced?
Class: (highly amused at the coincidence of what is on display) Ma’am, the projector is overheating. It will burst.
{At this point, the entire class has broken into mad fits of giggly laughter.}
1:50 p.m.
LA: So you know that the brain, it comes till here (*points with both hands at some place in her head*) maybe till our eyes… it extends beyond the nose…
{The class is dying of laughter now.}
LA: How many of you have been X-rayed?
xD
12:26 p.m.
LA: (to the class) If you mumble like a penguin no one will hear you.
{This was accompanied by significant hand gestures reminiscent of the times when, as kindergarteners, I was taught the greater than and less than signs.}
1:10 p.m.
LA: Ummmnh? What will I cover? When will I cover?
{I refuse to cite the reference and spoil the effect the above has on pervy minds.}
1:15 p.m.
LA: When I am giving you a flavour of everything, I am not asking you to cook it, I am asking you to taste it... Don’t worry it is very interesting.
{The above clause applies here as well xP.}
1:25 p.m.
Class: (owing to very faint scribbles on the whiteboard) Ma’am, we can’t see.
LA: (very earnestly) Imagine.
1:45 p.m.
LA: How many of you have microwaves at home? Ok. When you use a microwave, what have you experienced?
Class: (highly amused at the coincidence of what is on display) Ma’am, the projector is overheating. It will burst.
{At this point, the entire class has broken into mad fits of giggly laughter.}
1:50 p.m.
LA: So you know that the brain, it comes till here (*points with both hands at some place in her head*) maybe till our eyes… it extends beyond the nose…
{The class is dying of laughter now.}
LA: How many of you have been X-rayed?
xD
Sunday, 1 March 2009
Reflected Glow
I awoke to a dream of fireworks. Resplendent colours flashed across the sky and their patterns, reflected by the still waters of the lake cast many spells on my widening eyes. I had been flying again. Yet, all the vast stretches that I traversed, from the greens forgotten by man to cobwebbed shelves left dusty in the dark for all their loneliness, did not appeal much to my tears.
I had been following the lights. They seemed elusive at first, almost shy, but when one bright ball of assembled sparks shot up into the night it was only a visual symphony waiting to unfold. The colours assembled themselves and twirled lyrically to the sky’s delight. And mine. They zoomed towards the horizon, teased the waters to smile radiantly and mesmerized two small, dark orbs which seemed so much duller in contrast.
Since when had the night been dark enough to present the perfect stage? Since when had moonlight been dimmed in defeat to brighter bursts? No sounds emerged from the thicket nearby. Not a whisper from the wind, no rustling of tired leaves. The ground was set for the dazzling hues to set the night on fire.
And I watched to my heart’s content and flew along as I could. But the kaleidoscope always seemed just a heartbeat away. I could follow all I wanted, but I’d never be one with the lights. The closest I came to blending with the colours was when I left a kiss that rippled into the lake mirroring that glorious glow. The lights fled, however, as dawn approached, leaving a yearning soul dissatisfied, looking achingly towards east. That was as far as a mirror would go.
I had been following the lights. They seemed elusive at first, almost shy, but when one bright ball of assembled sparks shot up into the night it was only a visual symphony waiting to unfold. The colours assembled themselves and twirled lyrically to the sky’s delight. And mine. They zoomed towards the horizon, teased the waters to smile radiantly and mesmerized two small, dark orbs which seemed so much duller in contrast.
Since when had the night been dark enough to present the perfect stage? Since when had moonlight been dimmed in defeat to brighter bursts? No sounds emerged from the thicket nearby. Not a whisper from the wind, no rustling of tired leaves. The ground was set for the dazzling hues to set the night on fire.
And I watched to my heart’s content and flew along as I could. But the kaleidoscope always seemed just a heartbeat away. I could follow all I wanted, but I’d never be one with the lights. The closest I came to blending with the colours was when I left a kiss that rippled into the lake mirroring that glorious glow. The lights fled, however, as dawn approached, leaving a yearning soul dissatisfied, looking achingly towards east. That was as far as a mirror would go.
Tuesday, 24 February 2009
Within Peace
Date: 24.02.2009
Time: 8:03 p.m.
I’ve been rather accident prone of late. From accidental cuts, fever, scratches and a finger injury to various bruises which I don’t even remember acquiring, it has been quite an adventurous time for me. The funny thing is that I’ve been rather full, mainly in the sense that nothing seems to affect me much. I’ve actually stopped caring about so many things that I’m more at peace than I have been in a long time.
Yet, there is that quiet chill that makes me wonder if all of this is another stage of being ‘comfortably numb’. No, I haven’t been low. And there have been things which have made me genuinely happy. But it just isn’t like me to not react to annoyances such as taunts or disappointments. What is more surprising is that I am genuinely not giving a rat’s carcass about how I am being treated by most people. Or that I haven’t been able to keep in touch as much as I’d like with those who do understand and accept me. Or that there are very few people who I can truly be comfortable with without having to keep a certain distance. Whatever it is, I do hope that I don’t tire of it. Maybe I’m healthy now for a change, mentally, that is, and need to get used to a shade of normalcy.
The one thing which I am not particularly fond of at the moment is my workload this semester. I mean, it is rather pathetic to switch on the comp and log in to the Net only to download and study lectures. Add to that an extremely tiring schedule and you lose any energy you’d think you’d have to sit in the evening to write. I need some sort of inspiration. Education and related matters don’t quite fit the bill. Neither do fat, potentially pregnant lizards which invade the tiny bathroom attached to my room late at night to leave me entering the bathroom singing and running out screaming.
Domestic matters remain unresolved and I don’t think they ever will be sorted out. The people involved are much too old to change and I am too fed up to be ever-so-forgiving. Even then, strangely, I am living out each day without the dark clouds that used to perpetually linger around me not so long ago.
Perhaps this is how life is supposed to be. Whatever it is, I hope it doesn’t make me too tired, or too fulfilled to write, as it seems to be doing.
End: 8:22 p.m.
Time: 8:03 p.m.
I’ve been rather accident prone of late. From accidental cuts, fever, scratches and a finger injury to various bruises which I don’t even remember acquiring, it has been quite an adventurous time for me. The funny thing is that I’ve been rather full, mainly in the sense that nothing seems to affect me much. I’ve actually stopped caring about so many things that I’m more at peace than I have been in a long time.
Yet, there is that quiet chill that makes me wonder if all of this is another stage of being ‘comfortably numb’. No, I haven’t been low. And there have been things which have made me genuinely happy. But it just isn’t like me to not react to annoyances such as taunts or disappointments. What is more surprising is that I am genuinely not giving a rat’s carcass about how I am being treated by most people. Or that I haven’t been able to keep in touch as much as I’d like with those who do understand and accept me. Or that there are very few people who I can truly be comfortable with without having to keep a certain distance. Whatever it is, I do hope that I don’t tire of it. Maybe I’m healthy now for a change, mentally, that is, and need to get used to a shade of normalcy.
The one thing which I am not particularly fond of at the moment is my workload this semester. I mean, it is rather pathetic to switch on the comp and log in to the Net only to download and study lectures. Add to that an extremely tiring schedule and you lose any energy you’d think you’d have to sit in the evening to write. I need some sort of inspiration. Education and related matters don’t quite fit the bill. Neither do fat, potentially pregnant lizards which invade the tiny bathroom attached to my room late at night to leave me entering the bathroom singing and running out screaming.
Domestic matters remain unresolved and I don’t think they ever will be sorted out. The people involved are much too old to change and I am too fed up to be ever-so-forgiving. Even then, strangely, I am living out each day without the dark clouds that used to perpetually linger around me not so long ago.
Perhaps this is how life is supposed to be. Whatever it is, I hope it doesn’t make me too tired, or too fulfilled to write, as it seems to be doing.
End: 8:22 p.m.
Monday, 9 February 2009
Loony Ladies of the Last Row
Date: 09.02.2009
Time: 1:45 p.m.
LD: (Looking extremely disgruntled in class while observing the Professor) Look, she’s acting as though she’s teaching little children in elementary school.
DM is sitting on LD’s left.
DM: (Keeping a straight face while looking at the Professor) Yes, she’s showing us pictures.
LD: Is that how you hold a book, Ma’am? (turning towards DM) Look! She’s tainting the sanctity of the book!
DM gives LD a characteristic look which says that LD is being randomly weird again.
LD: (continuing and ignoring DM’s “look”) She’s raping the purity of the book — She’s putting creases where no creases were before!
DM: …
LD: (quite agitated by now) She’s marking her territory in places where she has to right to!
DM: (very matter-of-factly) Um, that just reminds me of dogs marking their territory by peeing.
2:00 p.m.
Class: (imploringly at the Professor who refuses to stop teaching even if Time itself were to come to an end bringing about Ultimate Doom) Ma’am! It’s time… we have another class now.
Professor: (looking at us after coming out of her picture-book-induced reverie) Ummmnh? What? Bell rang? Hmmm?
Class: Yes Ma’am, we heard the bell. It rang just now.
Professor: Oh so your ears are tuned to the bell however silent it is.
LD: (turning to DM again) So is that a bad thing? (Looks disgustedly at the Professor) We are punctual people, unlike you.
2:05 p.m.
Miss Minnie Mouse, had hitherto been to LD’s right, “holding it in” and also under the false impression that the next class was to be in another room, (an assumption probably pee-induced).
MMM: (to LD) Listen. I need to go to the toilet. Take my bag with you.
LD: Um, I’d like to go with you. (Pausing) I mean, till the outside and then go in once you’re done and you come out.
PB: (another classmate, sitting next to MMM, laughing) That was very specific.
LD: Yes, just to clear the air.
Honestly, the fact that a conversation gets posted after ages shows just how scarce humour has been in these recession-hit times. And I suppose the fact that I found out that today is “Chocolate Day” according to card-companies who want to make money to beat the recession blues after I reached college and also that my classmates were in the final stages of their insatiable craving for the said chocolate also helped. And I didn’t get any chocolate today. *BIG SNEEEEF* Which obviously is totally irrelevant in this context.
Oh well, we’re all back to hilarity now and toilet humour, of course. Can’t leave that out!
Time: 1:45 p.m.
LD: (Looking extremely disgruntled in class while observing the Professor) Look, she’s acting as though she’s teaching little children in elementary school.
DM is sitting on LD’s left.
DM: (Keeping a straight face while looking at the Professor) Yes, she’s showing us pictures.
LD: Is that how you hold a book, Ma’am? (turning towards DM) Look! She’s tainting the sanctity of the book!
DM gives LD a characteristic look which says that LD is being randomly weird again.
LD: (continuing and ignoring DM’s “look”) She’s raping the purity of the book — She’s putting creases where no creases were before!
DM: …
LD: (quite agitated by now) She’s marking her territory in places where she has to right to!
DM: (very matter-of-factly) Um, that just reminds me of dogs marking their territory by peeing.
2:00 p.m.
Class: (imploringly at the Professor who refuses to stop teaching even if Time itself were to come to an end bringing about Ultimate Doom) Ma’am! It’s time… we have another class now.
Professor: (looking at us after coming out of her picture-book-induced reverie) Ummmnh? What? Bell rang? Hmmm?
Class: Yes Ma’am, we heard the bell. It rang just now.
Professor: Oh so your ears are tuned to the bell however silent it is.
LD: (turning to DM again) So is that a bad thing? (Looks disgustedly at the Professor) We are punctual people, unlike you.
2:05 p.m.
Miss Minnie Mouse, had hitherto been to LD’s right, “holding it in” and also under the false impression that the next class was to be in another room, (an assumption probably pee-induced).
MMM: (to LD) Listen. I need to go to the toilet. Take my bag with you.
LD: Um, I’d like to go with you. (Pausing) I mean, till the outside and then go in once you’re done and you come out.
PB: (another classmate, sitting next to MMM, laughing) That was very specific.
LD: Yes, just to clear the air.
Honestly, the fact that a conversation gets posted after ages shows just how scarce humour has been in these recession-hit times. And I suppose the fact that I found out that today is “Chocolate Day” according to card-companies who want to make money to beat the recession blues after I reached college and also that my classmates were in the final stages of their insatiable craving for the said chocolate also helped. And I didn’t get any chocolate today. *BIG SNEEEEF* Which obviously is totally irrelevant in this context.
Oh well, we’re all back to hilarity now and toilet humour, of course. Can’t leave that out!
Thursday, 5 February 2009
Something to Think About
On some days a thought coming from an unexpected source can just strike you gently and leave you with a raised eyebrow and a smile. Today, while returning home from college, I was waiting inside an auto when I happened to become the silent observer of a rather interesting conversation between the auto-wallas.
One of them was trying to get some money out of the person driving the auto I was in, however, he replied saying that he had none to dish out as he had just paid his daughter's school fees. Another auto-walla soon joined the conversation and asked him if his daughter was in an English medium school. When the man replied in the negative, the latter told him that he should put his children in English medium schools if they are to make something of themselves. His spoke with great conviction when he said that it filled him with pride to hear his child speak in English when he himself could not.
Now I found the thought extremely heartening, not because I feel that fluency in English alone is enough for success... Frankly, I know plenty of people who speak incorrect English with much fluency and confidence and get away with murder (figuratively speaking, of course). And neither do I believe that those who study in institutions where English is not the teaching medium are any less capable than English-speakers. However, I'd rather like to think of it as a parent wanting to ensure that the next generation receives the benefit of a good education and all the advantages that it can provide even if the previous one hadn't. And it is a very encouraging sign that people who haven't had certain opportunities in life want their children, and this includes their daughters, to be educated so that they have a better life.
One of the gravest problems apart from poverty that plagues the country is ignorance. And this very ignorance leads to so much more poverty and exploitation. I would have to continue considerably if I were to talk about how these are inter-related. The saddest part is that so many are resistant to any changes that would look towards ameliorating this. Now if there are indeed people who are willing to take steps that would, in whatever small way, lead to the light, then it is to be taken as a beacon of hope. And yes, I'd like to hope that there are more people out there who are willing to take positive and progressive steps towards betterment and those who see their sons and daughters in the same light, something that is still lacking even amongst the educated.
One of them was trying to get some money out of the person driving the auto I was in, however, he replied saying that he had none to dish out as he had just paid his daughter's school fees. Another auto-walla soon joined the conversation and asked him if his daughter was in an English medium school. When the man replied in the negative, the latter told him that he should put his children in English medium schools if they are to make something of themselves. His spoke with great conviction when he said that it filled him with pride to hear his child speak in English when he himself could not.
Now I found the thought extremely heartening, not because I feel that fluency in English alone is enough for success... Frankly, I know plenty of people who speak incorrect English with much fluency and confidence and get away with murder (figuratively speaking, of course). And neither do I believe that those who study in institutions where English is not the teaching medium are any less capable than English-speakers. However, I'd rather like to think of it as a parent wanting to ensure that the next generation receives the benefit of a good education and all the advantages that it can provide even if the previous one hadn't. And it is a very encouraging sign that people who haven't had certain opportunities in life want their children, and this includes their daughters, to be educated so that they have a better life.
One of the gravest problems apart from poverty that plagues the country is ignorance. And this very ignorance leads to so much more poverty and exploitation. I would have to continue considerably if I were to talk about how these are inter-related. The saddest part is that so many are resistant to any changes that would look towards ameliorating this. Now if there are indeed people who are willing to take steps that would, in whatever small way, lead to the light, then it is to be taken as a beacon of hope. And yes, I'd like to hope that there are more people out there who are willing to take positive and progressive steps towards betterment and those who see their sons and daughters in the same light, something that is still lacking even amongst the educated.
Thursday, 29 January 2009
Monotony
Date: 28.01.2009
Time: 11:55 p.m.
O monotonous wind, embrace me not with your sullen gusts
I would take the sweeping temerity of a gale
To the dull breeze idling over an ordinary day
Shake up my world and blow me across the seas
But kill me not by entrapment in ease,
Stir me into running when I've only walked for days
Kiss my brow with a dusty whirlwind of speed
That leaves me stunned in its sultry haze
Beat my body into submission by your might
Make me surrender my will in defeated delight,
I only ask that you be free, truer to your nature
And capture my heart as you would a flighty creature
Sing to me with voices carried from horizons of yore
Breathe yourself as I inhale the scent of rebellion
Arising from the need to quell the monotony of ages.
End: 00:15 a.m.
Time: 11:55 p.m.
O monotonous wind, embrace me not with your sullen gusts
I would take the sweeping temerity of a gale
To the dull breeze idling over an ordinary day
Shake up my world and blow me across the seas
But kill me not by entrapment in ease,
Stir me into running when I've only walked for days
Kiss my brow with a dusty whirlwind of speed
That leaves me stunned in its sultry haze
Beat my body into submission by your might
Make me surrender my will in defeated delight,
I only ask that you be free, truer to your nature
And capture my heart as you would a flighty creature
Sing to me with voices carried from horizons of yore
Breathe yourself as I inhale the scent of rebellion
Arising from the need to quell the monotony of ages.
End: 00:15 a.m.
Monday, 26 January 2009
Lingering Lizard
Date: 26.01.2009
Time: 9:40 p.m.
The lizard crawling up my door
Was one I hadn’t seen before
Its dreadfully disgusting sight
Gave me quite the jolt last night
As I watched it move its sick small head
While I was on my way to bed
Almost about to fall asleep
Only to lose the urge for slumber deep.
That awful lizard was back today
Much to my distress and dismay
Creeping stealthily down a wall
Hoping that I wouldn’t notice its crawl
And the fact that it’s invaded my room
Disrupted peace and inflicted gloom,
I live in terror of finding it land
With one fine jump upon my hand
Shoulder, foot or worse, my face
To leap away with unholy grace
Even before it was put in place
By one good smack from a spectacle case.
It hides behind my wall clock now
Peering out now and then to bow
And nod its head most mockingly
To rudely appal most shockingly
I am almost tempted to camp outside
The thought, however, wounds my pride
And so I shall remain to fight
Until this insidious creature takes flight.
End: 10:10 p.m.
Time: 9:40 p.m.
The lizard crawling up my door
Was one I hadn’t seen before
Its dreadfully disgusting sight
Gave me quite the jolt last night
As I watched it move its sick small head
While I was on my way to bed
Almost about to fall asleep
Only to lose the urge for slumber deep.
That awful lizard was back today
Much to my distress and dismay
Creeping stealthily down a wall
Hoping that I wouldn’t notice its crawl
And the fact that it’s invaded my room
Disrupted peace and inflicted gloom,
I live in terror of finding it land
With one fine jump upon my hand
Shoulder, foot or worse, my face
To leap away with unholy grace
Even before it was put in place
By one good smack from a spectacle case.
It hides behind my wall clock now
Peering out now and then to bow
And nod its head most mockingly
To rudely appal most shockingly
I am almost tempted to camp outside
The thought, however, wounds my pride
And so I shall remain to fight
Until this insidious creature takes flight.
End: 10:10 p.m.
Thursday, 22 January 2009
Slow Air
Date: 22.01.2009
Time: 4:10 p.m.
A chilly afternoon is the perfect time to step outdoors and ride through the neighbourhood. The cool air is mild enough to invigorate you into sailing through the narrow lanes of a child’s memory. People are mostly indoors while a stray cat can be seen prowling in a slightly unkempt lawn. It is just the time to slip on an extra shirt and allow the cold to stiffen your muscles, just enough for that extra bit of effort needed to move, without the accompanying discomfort.
It is peaceful. The trees appear to not have noticed the nip in the air and cling firmly to their leaves. Two young cats meow and chase after one another. The neighbourhood where I spent the first few years of my life remains unaffected by the winds that have blown across it over the years. It is that conventional stretch of reality that I am glad to have left behind. I would not have fit in there, though it is something that will remain true wherever I go. I dislike boundaries — the wanderer that I am. Monotony and idleness tire me more than any strenuous activity could.
The same can be said about my area of residence for the last thirteen years. It is as dusty as ever in its attempt to cling on the vestiges of a more pastoral past. The puppies that were born just a few days ago have been growing at an alarming rate. The dogs live in the dirt, though. It is funny how I still don’t know who my neighbours are, apart from those in my building. Although I must add that the trees adding a spot of untainted green to the scenery are dearer now than ever before…
A January sun is not one that boasts of a blazing intensity. Instead, it confers gentle warmth whenever it chooses to make its presence felt. It is quiet and passive in its attempt to make an impression and lives almost in conjunction with the evening air. This is the season in which I want to spend my nights up at the terrace, with a lit bonfire and some mellow music to make me feel in tune with the stars. And I’d like some good company as well, that with which the wall of pretence and forced goodwill becomes unnecessary.
All I need at the moment is a fitting sunset, followed by the dawning of novelty.
End: 4:30 p.m.
Time: 4:10 p.m.
A chilly afternoon is the perfect time to step outdoors and ride through the neighbourhood. The cool air is mild enough to invigorate you into sailing through the narrow lanes of a child’s memory. People are mostly indoors while a stray cat can be seen prowling in a slightly unkempt lawn. It is just the time to slip on an extra shirt and allow the cold to stiffen your muscles, just enough for that extra bit of effort needed to move, without the accompanying discomfort.
It is peaceful. The trees appear to not have noticed the nip in the air and cling firmly to their leaves. Two young cats meow and chase after one another. The neighbourhood where I spent the first few years of my life remains unaffected by the winds that have blown across it over the years. It is that conventional stretch of reality that I am glad to have left behind. I would not have fit in there, though it is something that will remain true wherever I go. I dislike boundaries — the wanderer that I am. Monotony and idleness tire me more than any strenuous activity could.
The same can be said about my area of residence for the last thirteen years. It is as dusty as ever in its attempt to cling on the vestiges of a more pastoral past. The puppies that were born just a few days ago have been growing at an alarming rate. The dogs live in the dirt, though. It is funny how I still don’t know who my neighbours are, apart from those in my building. Although I must add that the trees adding a spot of untainted green to the scenery are dearer now than ever before…
A January sun is not one that boasts of a blazing intensity. Instead, it confers gentle warmth whenever it chooses to make its presence felt. It is quiet and passive in its attempt to make an impression and lives almost in conjunction with the evening air. This is the season in which I want to spend my nights up at the terrace, with a lit bonfire and some mellow music to make me feel in tune with the stars. And I’d like some good company as well, that with which the wall of pretence and forced goodwill becomes unnecessary.
All I need at the moment is a fitting sunset, followed by the dawning of novelty.
End: 4:30 p.m.
Monday, 19 January 2009
Backseat Driving
Date: 19.01.2009
Time: 7:50 p.m.
There should be a nation-wide rule which forbids people from driving from the backseat. More specifically, there should be a law that prevents fathers from constantly hollering at their offspring from the backseat of an automobile while it is being driven by the said offspring.
This morning’s “Pick up! Pick up! Change to third gear — now change to fourth! Speed, speed up! Turn now, turn — Start! BRAKE!” is moral support I could do without while driving. Inarguably, the case stands even more pronounced when I am allowed to drive to college only after having had a heated argument *cough* ahem, no, discussion with my father the previous evening, in which I was categorically told that I would not be allowed to drive at all if anything were to happen to the car.
Therefore, it was with a heart brimming with confidence and encouragement that I took to the wheels this morning and did my best to please daddy dearest with my navigational prowess. The ride was understandably smooth as I was under no pressure at all, especially since I was constantly being given much-needed heartening instructions from the backseat in spite of it being me who was driving. Honestly, our chauffeur turned out to be the more patient co-pilot as he would occasionally give me a nod saying that all was going well or give me a tip or two and let me handle the rest.
I suppose the old man was far more nervous than I since he had to think about both my hide and the car’s steel, er, body, whatever. Thankfully, my pride came to the rescue and I managed to make it to college, much earlier than usual and with myself and my co-passengers in one piece.
The funniest things happened after I made it to college though. Dad actually gave me a rare “Well done” before going off to work and later this evening, after he returned home and had satisfied himself by listing the places where I’d gone wrong today, he told mum that I’d driven well in front of me. What actually took the cake, however, was him calling me aside and telling me that there was a lot of backseat driving today and that I should not be so dependent on others for instructions since I shall be driving alone on most occasions. When I told mum about dad’s pep talk during the drive she grinned like the Cheshire cat and said that she was highly amused to hear two extremely different versions of the same story. Trust mothers to say things like that.
In any case, dad is willing to let me out with the car again so I’ll see what happens. Hopefully I’ll get to practice more and be trusted with the car. Here’s to that!
End: 8:13 p.m.
Time: 7:50 p.m.
There should be a nation-wide rule which forbids people from driving from the backseat. More specifically, there should be a law that prevents fathers from constantly hollering at their offspring from the backseat of an automobile while it is being driven by the said offspring.
This morning’s “Pick up! Pick up! Change to third gear — now change to fourth! Speed, speed up! Turn now, turn — Start! BRAKE!” is moral support I could do without while driving. Inarguably, the case stands even more pronounced when I am allowed to drive to college only after having had a heated argument *cough* ahem, no, discussion with my father the previous evening, in which I was categorically told that I would not be allowed to drive at all if anything were to happen to the car.
Therefore, it was with a heart brimming with confidence and encouragement that I took to the wheels this morning and did my best to please daddy dearest with my navigational prowess. The ride was understandably smooth as I was under no pressure at all, especially since I was constantly being given much-needed heartening instructions from the backseat in spite of it being me who was driving. Honestly, our chauffeur turned out to be the more patient co-pilot as he would occasionally give me a nod saying that all was going well or give me a tip or two and let me handle the rest.
I suppose the old man was far more nervous than I since he had to think about both my hide and the car’s steel, er, body, whatever. Thankfully, my pride came to the rescue and I managed to make it to college, much earlier than usual and with myself and my co-passengers in one piece.
The funniest things happened after I made it to college though. Dad actually gave me a rare “Well done” before going off to work and later this evening, after he returned home and had satisfied himself by listing the places where I’d gone wrong today, he told mum that I’d driven well in front of me. What actually took the cake, however, was him calling me aside and telling me that there was a lot of backseat driving today and that I should not be so dependent on others for instructions since I shall be driving alone on most occasions. When I told mum about dad’s pep talk during the drive she grinned like the Cheshire cat and said that she was highly amused to hear two extremely different versions of the same story. Trust mothers to say things like that.
In any case, dad is willing to let me out with the car again so I’ll see what happens. Hopefully I’ll get to practice more and be trusted with the car. Here’s to that!
End: 8:13 p.m.
Sunday, 18 January 2009
Nachtmusik :P
So I am lousy at water colours and this thing just proves that but I spent the afternoon painting this today so I figured that it might well be put up since I actually having nothing to do. Heh. I guess that is what I had to say, yes. :P
Friday, 16 January 2009
Cradle
Date: 15.01.2009
Time: 11:05 p.m.
Slowly still, yet embraced by winds
Rocking it towards the nether
Its child was made to leave the ease
And comfort of its feather,
See how it no longer fits the head
So filled with thoughts it can’t comprehend
In tune with toys and caramel
And the warmth that some voices lend…
When wisdom invades the innocent’s stare
Awakening it to more shades of a colour
Narrowed eyes replace the wide
Inflicting upon rosy cheeks a pallor,
The pout is pursed and parted not
Except to yield honeyed lisps
That mask the cynic lurking within
By deceptively dreamy wisps.
The sudden gale that struck the cradle
Had knocked the child to her feet
And forced her to walk before her time
In lessons painful and bittersweet,
The cradle thus remains forlorn
With no memory of its loss
Or the gurgling grace of a childhood
Now resting dead beneath a cross.
End: 11:40 p.m.
Time: 11:05 p.m.
Slowly still, yet embraced by winds
Rocking it towards the nether
Its child was made to leave the ease
And comfort of its feather,
See how it no longer fits the head
So filled with thoughts it can’t comprehend
In tune with toys and caramel
And the warmth that some voices lend…
When wisdom invades the innocent’s stare
Awakening it to more shades of a colour
Narrowed eyes replace the wide
Inflicting upon rosy cheeks a pallor,
The pout is pursed and parted not
Except to yield honeyed lisps
That mask the cynic lurking within
By deceptively dreamy wisps.
The sudden gale that struck the cradle
Had knocked the child to her feet
And forced her to walk before her time
In lessons painful and bittersweet,
The cradle thus remains forlorn
With no memory of its loss
Or the gurgling grace of a childhood
Now resting dead beneath a cross.
End: 11:40 p.m.
Tuesday, 6 January 2009
Another New Dawn
Date: 06.01.2009
Time: 7:50 p.m.
Today was the first hectic day of many hectic days my class has in store for itself this semester. Honestly, this is one term which is somewhat scaring people with the amount of coursework right from day one. Usually, extra classes are squeezed into our schedule as the weeks go by, thereby softening the blow. This time, however, when I saw the timetable for the first time last night I was tempted to hurl the coarsest of all abuses, the kind that auto-wallas would probably be using a lot these days, at the computer screen. “Saala ch*****” would be one of the tamer ones that crossed my mind.
It seems a major strain to wake up at the unearthly hour of a quarter past seven in the morning after consistently awakening at ten regardless of the time I had gone to sleep the previous night for a rather warmly comfortable stretch of days. Still, it wouldn’t be quite so bad if I didn’t have a string of classes that tax my ability to concentrate at a stretch to wake up to every day.
The year itself started a day late for me. The time immediately before and after the last midnight of 2008 was rather dismal. Although, things have improved considerably since, excluding the rotten timetable of course. In fact, my writing has suffered — I am usually compelled to write when I am either extremely bored or extremely depressed while I am neither right now. I shouldn’t be complaining though… there’s plenty to do.
I’ve been watching a lot of movies at home lately, with more queued up in my viewing list. There is the two-day out of station seminar that my class and seniors will be attending in a couple of days. Our professors appear to have resigned themselves to the fact that we’re out to enjoy ourselves more than pay attention to what will be said there. I have deliciously spicy, creamy and cheesy macaroni to eat for dinner and there are some (hopefully) interesting events to look forward to later this month and in the coming year.
I am hoping for this year to teach me a lot of lessons that I will enjoy learning for a change, those of patience and self-control especially. And I hope to grow up a little more from six to thirteen, at least. Although I am sure that I’ll be fluctuating between almost all ages from six to sixty at different points of time. It doesn’t matter too much though. I just hope I won’t be told that I look like a seventh grader by the odd ancient stranger I meet at boring social functions.
So to all readers I wish a late but very happy new year! LD out.
End: 8:10 p.m.
Time: 7:50 p.m.
Today was the first hectic day of many hectic days my class has in store for itself this semester. Honestly, this is one term which is somewhat scaring people with the amount of coursework right from day one. Usually, extra classes are squeezed into our schedule as the weeks go by, thereby softening the blow. This time, however, when I saw the timetable for the first time last night I was tempted to hurl the coarsest of all abuses, the kind that auto-wallas would probably be using a lot these days, at the computer screen. “Saala ch*****” would be one of the tamer ones that crossed my mind.
It seems a major strain to wake up at the unearthly hour of a quarter past seven in the morning after consistently awakening at ten regardless of the time I had gone to sleep the previous night for a rather warmly comfortable stretch of days. Still, it wouldn’t be quite so bad if I didn’t have a string of classes that tax my ability to concentrate at a stretch to wake up to every day.
The year itself started a day late for me. The time immediately before and after the last midnight of 2008 was rather dismal. Although, things have improved considerably since, excluding the rotten timetable of course. In fact, my writing has suffered — I am usually compelled to write when I am either extremely bored or extremely depressed while I am neither right now. I shouldn’t be complaining though… there’s plenty to do.
I’ve been watching a lot of movies at home lately, with more queued up in my viewing list. There is the two-day out of station seminar that my class and seniors will be attending in a couple of days. Our professors appear to have resigned themselves to the fact that we’re out to enjoy ourselves more than pay attention to what will be said there. I have deliciously spicy, creamy and cheesy macaroni to eat for dinner and there are some (hopefully) interesting events to look forward to later this month and in the coming year.
I am hoping for this year to teach me a lot of lessons that I will enjoy learning for a change, those of patience and self-control especially. And I hope to grow up a little more from six to thirteen, at least. Although I am sure that I’ll be fluctuating between almost all ages from six to sixty at different points of time. It doesn’t matter too much though. I just hope I won’t be told that I look like a seventh grader by the odd ancient stranger I meet at boring social functions.
So to all readers I wish a late but very happy new year! LD out.
End: 8:10 p.m.
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