Fait accompli - Part I

My hands were shaking again... I had to find a place to sit. The searing pain in my chest shot well beyond my ribs and blinded me to everything else.

‘It’s happening again,’ I thought, as I stumbled chaotically and collapsed into my seat. The one-foot long journey had seemed like miles. As I lay in a dead faint my cell-phone began to vibrate. Schen was calling.

‘I can’t talk to him like this!’ I panicked as the phone kept on shuffling closer and closer to the edge of my table. Finally, after the world stopped spinning, all was still.

I felt too weak to move but there was work to be done and I couldn’t have anyone finding out about the attack, especially Schen. I turned softly and looked around the room and through the tinted glass that separated me from the rest of them.

‘Good, no one was around.’

Very gingerly, I tried moving my feet. When I saw that I could move them, I carefully hoisted myself up, using the table as a support.

‘So far, so good!’

It took tremendous willpower to keep myself up, but I didn’t have a choice. If the others found out what had happened just now, I’d certainly be packed off home. Probably forever.

‘No, I have to finish this.’

It seemed like hours, but I managed to go back to the shelf I’d been examining, get all the documents I needed and resume work.

The rest of the evening passed rather tamely. I took a cab home, not wanting to risk driving. Thankfully, it was Schen’s evening with the car. I was back just in time to shower, warm dinner and take a short nap to recuperate before he returned. By then, at least I was looking less like a corpse.

“Hey! How was your day?” I asked Schen, greeting him with a warm smile as his tired face managed to muster one upon seeing me.

“Oh, you know. It’s been a hard couple of weeks. But it’ll pass,” he answered, kissing me.

“Well, I’m sure dinner will take your mind off it for a while!” I replied as I took his hand and led him to the dining table.

“It’s your favourite,” I smiled as I handed him a plateful of pasta soaked in creamy cheese.

‘It’s a good thing he’s so tired, otherwise he’d ask about the call,’ I thought.

“So how come you didn’t answer my call earlier?” he asked in between mouthfuls.

“Oh. Oh! You’d called? Sorry, I got so caught up with work that I forgot all about my phone!” I recovered quickly.

He shook his head, tapped my nose with his finger and smiled.

“You’ll never change.”

‘Phew,’ thought I, ‘At least he didn’t ask further.’

“I’d called to ask if you wanted to go out for drinks later tonight. You know, Zeo and Ren are in town! It’s been ages...”

“Yes, yes it has! Oh, I wish I’d seen your call! How’re their kids doing? What did you tell them?”

“Calm down, calm down!” he laughed, “I hadn’t made any plans with them. I heard they were in town and wanted to talk it over with you first.”

“Ah,” I said sheepishly, “I should really stop getting worked up so easily.”

“Yes you should! It’s bad for your heart. By the way, have you, uh, has it –?”

He couldn’t bring himself to finish the question and I felt absolutely wretched as I said, “Oh no! It’s been peachy! I haven’t felt better in months!”

He gave me a curious look but then didn’t pursue the matter further.

Later that night as Schen was fast asleep, I kept going over what had happened. It was the second time in two months and I knew that it couldn’t be ignored any further.

‘But what am I to do? When it's only a matter of time...’

We were still so young! It pained me terribly to think of what he’d go through if I –

‘No! I can’t think that way’ I scolded myself.

But that didn’t stop the tears from slipping silently through the eyelids determined to keep them reigned in.

~ * ~

So, what say? Should I continue with this? Lemme know!