Date: 17.04.2008
Time: 00:13 a.m.
It’s quite strange to sit and wait for something to come to my mind. I want to write. And there is so much to write about! Yet, there’s much I don’t feel like sharing. It’s as though it is something so exquisitely private … and beautiful that it’s not even meant to be undermined by trapping it within words.
My days have been mixed. I’ve been physically exhausted, almost to the point where I want to lie down and sleep for hours, forgetting all my responsibilities to everyday existence. I am drenched by the stifling heat which saps all of my strength and much of my resolve. There are matters beyond my control about which I feel like grumbling, but I must resign myself to a state of acceptance, since they are, after all, matters beyond my control. No grumbles, rants or complaints will help the situation. In fact, I may simply end up adding more anxious lines marked by desperation on a reflection. And no, I can’t bring myself to do that right now, however much my soul writhes everyday … however much it protests against the injustice of denied Time and Space. I need to be strong, and wait. With patience, with patience…
But then, I have the will, and the reason to wait, to endure, and to survive. This will pass, and shall soon be another wave that recedes back to the ocean after thrashing violently against the shore. And then, all that is precious and treasured will be with me to cherish in all its sweetness, and all its pristine glory.
Life awaits me. I can hear it call from a distance. The sounds were faint at first, almost tentative… hesitant, as though taking time to decide whether I was worthy of them, whether I was responsive to them. And then those whispers grew louder and became full-blown cries of jubilation, calling out to me, charming me to join in the celebrations. As I grew aware of them, awakening from my state of deathly dormancy, I answered. And now, I must wait with patience and with strength to board the train that will take me towards life, and hope, and tranquillity, and joy.
It shall come, it shall come soon. It’s only a matter of a few days, a few weeks at most. It can be done, oh yes, it can! I’ll be waiting, and reading, and writing till then.
End: 00:45 a.m.
Time: 00:13 a.m.
It’s quite strange to sit and wait for something to come to my mind. I want to write. And there is so much to write about! Yet, there’s much I don’t feel like sharing. It’s as though it is something so exquisitely private … and beautiful that it’s not even meant to be undermined by trapping it within words.
My days have been mixed. I’ve been physically exhausted, almost to the point where I want to lie down and sleep for hours, forgetting all my responsibilities to everyday existence. I am drenched by the stifling heat which saps all of my strength and much of my resolve. There are matters beyond my control about which I feel like grumbling, but I must resign myself to a state of acceptance, since they are, after all, matters beyond my control. No grumbles, rants or complaints will help the situation. In fact, I may simply end up adding more anxious lines marked by desperation on a reflection. And no, I can’t bring myself to do that right now, however much my soul writhes everyday … however much it protests against the injustice of denied Time and Space. I need to be strong, and wait. With patience, with patience…
But then, I have the will, and the reason to wait, to endure, and to survive. This will pass, and shall soon be another wave that recedes back to the ocean after thrashing violently against the shore. And then, all that is precious and treasured will be with me to cherish in all its sweetness, and all its pristine glory.
Life awaits me. I can hear it call from a distance. The sounds were faint at first, almost tentative… hesitant, as though taking time to decide whether I was worthy of them, whether I was responsive to them. And then those whispers grew louder and became full-blown cries of jubilation, calling out to me, charming me to join in the celebrations. As I grew aware of them, awakening from my state of deathly dormancy, I answered. And now, I must wait with patience and with strength to board the train that will take me towards life, and hope, and tranquillity, and joy.
It shall come, it shall come soon. It’s only a matter of a few days, a few weeks at most. It can be done, oh yes, it can! I’ll be waiting, and reading, and writing till then.
End: 00:45 a.m.
4 comments:
Aah.
:)
Aah! :) *stares dreamily off into the night*
its beautiful :)
loved the positivity...
(erm,is that a word? "positivity"?)
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